Talking to Friends About Money

This one is often overlooked, but it can be one of the most awkward. Friends ask to borrow money. Friends want to split bills. Friends have different spending habits. Friends are in different financial situations.

The Right Principle

Your financial boundaries are valid. You do not owe anyone an explanation.

Talking About Loan Requests

“I love you, and I would rather not mix money and friendship. I cannot lend you money right now, but I can help you in other ways like connecting you with resources, helping you budget, or just listening.”

Talking About Unequal Spending

If you are in a different financial situation from your friends, it is okay to say:

“I would love to join you, but I cannot afford that right now. Would you be open to doing [cheaper alternative] instead?”

Talking About Splitting Bills

“Can we split this evenly, or should we just pay for what we ordered?”

The Golden Rule of Friends and Money

If you value the friendship, do not lend money you cannot afford to lose. And do not lend money without clear terms. “I can lend you $100, but I need it back by the 15th.”